The Non-Definitive Guide To Life

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So I guess I’m doing this…


“There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long-range risks of comfortable inaction.”-  John F. Kennedy

I’m not a political person. I don’t share my opinion about politics on social media. I’m a thoughts and prayers person cause honestly, first of all, I’m a person that prays and second, a social media post isn’t going to encompass that enormity of my heartbreak, confusion, and absolute feelings of helplessness. So when I pray, I’m not praying for families necessarily, I’m mostly praying that an answer to the madness will arise. That legislation will be presented that I can vote on. That something of logic and reason, outside of party agendas, will be developed in order to address the complexity of the problem with the same level of insight to a solution. Because it’s layered, it’s not simple, and you can’t fit the fix on the back of a bumper sticker or in an internet meme.

I remember when Sandy Hook happened. I was doing the social media for a hair care company and I went up to the owner saying, I’m not posting on social media today. We’re going silent because no one wants to hear about hair care tips. Fast forward 5 years, I still work in social media, but I post content on days of horrendous violence, there is no moment of silence. Because the violence is so frequent, the silence becomes deafening. So social media becomes the ad in a magazine or a billboard on the side of the road, another advertisement while you listen to the tragic stories pouring out on the radio waves. And I’m ok with that. Because a brand has no place in chiming in on these incidents.

But I’m not a brand, I’m a human. I have nieces and nephews in school.  I have family members who are faculty and work at schools across Southern California.  Mass shootings are not a party issue, it’s a human one. The Republicans and Democrats are failing us, not working together, not listening to each other, not coming to a middle ground, and not addressing the full scope of the problem. Republicans, yes it’s about addressing how to intervene and respond to a mentally disturbed person. Democrats, yes it’s about gun reform and not having access to assault rifles. Both parties, it’s not black and white, so find the fucking grey!!

In the age of information, the agencies that are meant to protect us still behave like they are blind. How are we able to stop terrorists’ acts when planned by a foreign terrorist organization, but not prevent an act of violence by a disturbed person who is openly posting about their intent online? Sure, innocent until proven guilty, but if you’ve seen Mindhunter on Netflix or any episode of Criminal Minds, you should know twisted disturbed behavior doesn’t pop out of nowhere, and you can map out criminal violent behavior. But I’m not an expert in psychopathy, policy, or sociology – all I know is that there is no logical reason why a person who has been reported to the FBI should still have access to an assault weapon. Logic.  So it’s also a protocol issue, what is our law enforcement and agency’s empowered to do when it comes to determining the severity of what may seem like an idle threat.

Most people have said something to the effect of, “I hate people” or “I wish they were dead,” at one point or another because they are human and say shit that holds no real weight. Phrases that the inner moral compass course corrects into, “well they suck as a person, and I hope to never have to interact with them again.” I’ve been depressed. I’ve had dark thoughts. I one time joked on the phone with the receptionist at my therapist office, that I’m on edge and feel like killing everyone – she went silent, and I had an “oh shit” moment and quickly said, “I don’t mean that I’m just not in a good place and need an appointment ASAP. I’m not going to actually harm anyone or myself.” If at that moment she put my name on a list, I would have been ok with it, because we need to be held accountable for the shit we say. I was also 19.

I don’t know politics. But I can’t believe that we’ve had a series of horrific acts of violence in this nation and the needle hasn’t moved AT ALL. The weekend my husband had his bachelor party, his nephew couldn’t make it, because he was out of town, in Las Vegas at a music festival. Yeah, he, fortunately, was not harmed at that mass shooting. But his niece, well her husband had a cousin who was sent to the hospital because of the shooting.

Why has the needle not moved?

I’m not an activist. But I can’t be silent anymore. And the one thing I do know is social media. So I’m going to tweet the following two messages out to every senator and house representative until I’m blocked. I only have 500 twitter followers, and if I lose every single one of them because of this activation – it’s worth it.

Tweet 1: You can stop the mass shootings. You have the power. You can put policy in place that intervenes and sets protocols. You can impact mental health. Risk your job for our well being. We need you to act. #dosomething

Tweet 2Mass shootings are heartbreaking and you have the power to change things. Please, we need gun reform. We need intervention and protocol. We need mental health care. Stand up, stand out, and make a difference. Why are you in this position if not to make a difference? #dosomething

I believe in speaking with love and kindness. I believe in empowering people, not scolding them.

I hope I can help move the needle, so I guess I’m doing this.

GOAL – 2 tweets a day to at least 10 people or more…

There are 500 + people to tweet, I’m using this list:

I’m scheduling my tweets through  TweetDeck. Here are instructions if you want to join:

so much love & so much light

EDITOR UPDATE: I had to stop this campaign as Twitter updated it’s terms and tweeting that same thing to a person / multiple people was considered spam and your account could become deactivated. 12/21/18

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We’ve all been pissed before. We’ve all wished something bad on someone else. But in the age of the internet things escalate quickly, and it seems that people forget another human in on the other end of the venomous toxic message that is being sent out over the interweb. There is definitely a dehumanization occurring in society, a disintegration of civility, and maybe it’s because we interact with a screen more than actual people – but let’s bring back the humanity in our threats! You can be spiteful without forgetting that someone with a family, friends, and loved ones is on the receiving end of your vitriol. There are pretty vile people in this world, and the person you disagree with online is likely not the worst of them…

So, here are 25 things to say when really pissed off and disagree with someone besides…

“I hope you die.”

“You deserve to get raped.”


“Go kill yourself.”

  1. I hope you sweat through your clothes before an important interview
  2. I hope you get a mildly infected ingrown pubic hair
  3. I hope you get a bad haircut
  4. I hope you step in poison oak and have a non-deadly bad reaction
  5. I hope you run out of gas on the way to work
  6. I hope you accidentally delete 2 hours’ worth of work and have to start over
  7. I hope better people than you get tickets to that thing you want
  8. I hope you don’t fit into that outfit you love until you become a better person
  9. I hope when you arrive late for your dinner reservations, they can’t make space for you.
  10. You deserve to stub your toe and hit your funny bone on the same day
  11. You deserve for something you stood in line for to be sold out right before your turn
  12. You deserve to accidentally run your car into a parking pole
  13. You deserve pink eye on your wedding day
  14. You deserve to be passed up for a job promotion because you’re not awesome.
  15. You deserve food poisoning on your birthday
  16. You deserve to sit on a long flight next to someone with bad body odor
  17. You deserve to have food in your teeth all day, especially during something important
  18. You deserve to catch every red light, every time you drive, FOREVER
  19. You deserve to have your computer reboot and update before a deadline
  20. I hope you get a nose pimple
  21. I hope you get locked out of your car without AAA
  22. I hope you have to walk a long distance in the cold without a jacket
  23. I hope your air-conditioner breaks during the summer
  24. I hope you drop your ice cream cone
  25. I hope you have a MEDIOCRE day
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mixtape monday may 11

I had a really focused week last week. It was productive and creatively fulfilling. I’m actually developing a rhythm, FINALLY, and I have the google calendar app to thank for most of it. Marking down my tasks and color coding them, it’s like the productivity angels swooped down and gave me a gift from the heavens. Anyways, these are the songs that drew my attention away from my laser focus and made me go – oh add that one!

‘Can’t Keep Checking My Phone’ – Unknown Mortal Orchestra / ‘Nocturne’ – Wild Nothing/ ‘Boys Latin’ – Panda Bear / ‘FFunny FFriends’ – Unknown Mortal Orchestra / ‘Coulda Been My Love’ – Foxygen/ ‘Red Eyes’ – The War on Drugs/ ‘ I’m Writing a Novel’ – Father John Misty

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Budget Friendly Tip! – Naked Juice



A budget friendly tip from Bekka, me! One of the best and most expensive Juices on the market is Naked Juice. I work right next to a Whole Foods, so when I want a juice fix my budget friendly options are kind of low. At some point “prices per once” comes into play to really make sure I am getting the most bang for my buck. Yet I go one step further, once I am back to the office I also cutt my naked juice with water, usually half and half.

Naked Juice is very concentrated, and sometimes I find to be a little too sweet.  I love the less concentrated version with water mixed in, and it makes my Naked Juice last twice as long!

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